“Wounded Social Justice Warrior Project” Empowers; Provides Hope

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Patricia Shoemaker, 27, who goes by “Toby,” and is non-gender binary, found it difficult to put into words just what she had experienced during her days as a social justice warrior.

She didn’t have to. The way the obscenely overweight feminist apologetically paused, fought back tears, and forced out a simple, “Stuff happened there,” told the emotional story of the pain she’s been carrying since she first started fighting for gender equality almost two years ago.

Shoemaker’s troubles reached a tipping point the day she organized an anti-Donald Trump rally in Shelbyville, Tennessee. Shoemaker and a group of fellow Berkley students made the long trek from Berkley, CA, to protest President Trump’s treatment of women in the Volunteer State.

Only an hour into their protest, a man wearing a MAGA hat and draped in the confederate flag approached the police barricades and screamed “feminazi pig” in her direction from a mere twenty feet away. For Shoemaker, it was, “like being shot point blank in the face with a high-capacity, belt-fed, .12 gauge assault M-16. Twice.”

“I was in a complete state of shock,” said Shoemaker, “I couldn’t feel my legs and thought I may have been paralyzed.” After refusing treatment from the “fascist Nazi” police officers who immediately offered to lend assistance, Shoemaker was rushed to a local medical facility for minor emotional distress. She caught the first flight to Berkley to seek a second opinion, stating, “You know, like, you can’t trust doctors from the South. They probably just wanted to medicate me so they could rape me.”

“Toby was showing all the classic symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD,” said Dr. Tushar Mohammed, Shoemaker’s physician in Berkley. “Re-experiencing the trauma through intrusive and distressing recollections of the event, flashbacks, and nightmares are just some of…uh, Miss…excuse me, their symptoms,” warned Mohammed.

The Shoemaker family researched treatment options across the country, hoping to find a program that would give their daughter the best overall chance at a full recovery. After almost an hour of exhausting Google searches and Yelp reviews, the family were quickly losing hope, until an email from a wounded slacktivist suggested they call the Wounded Social Justice Warrior Project® in Portland, Oregon.

The program provides personalized medical care, re-homing and legal advocacy to seriously wounded social justice warriors—including those who have suffered post traumatic stress disorder and other mental health conditions.

Besides adaptive and rehabilitative programs and caregiver support, the WSJWP also provides mentorship to recovering activists, an employment and career assistance program, and financial assistance for those who have suffered or aggravated an injury or illness and need help with daily living activities, so they can avoid being hospitalized or put in an outpatient care facility.

For Toby, the WSJWP has been a dream come true. After a strenuous and challenging three months in the program, Shoemaker is starting to feel whole again, and is even looking forward to rejoining activist “comrades” in time to protest the Wounded Warrior Project next month. “They’re such a ripoff, those misogynist Veterans get better treatment from the VA than we get via ACA. This fraud and pandering needs to stop.”

Shoemaker attributes her success and health improvement to the care provided by the WSJWP. “They literally saved me life.”

About the Wounded Social Justice Warrior Project®:

“The mission of the Wounded Social Justice Warrior Project® is to honor and empower our wounded heroes. Its purpose is to raise awareness of injured social activists, to help find them aid, and to provide unique, direct programs and services, uniquely personalized to help them continue with their activism efforts for the Greater Good.  WSJWP is a national, nonpartisan organization headquartered in Portland, Oregon. Proudly sponsored by George Soros and Tom Steyer.”

5 COMMENTS

  1. That was hilarious enough that I had people come to my office to see if I was OK. Note to self–don’t attempt to drink coffee while reading these satire pieces…
    Wounded Social Justice Warrior Project… I love it!

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  2. I’m a single father, veteran, stroke suvivor, trying to get back to work. In my history I have not been hired for jobs because I am not a less qualified single black women. Affirmative Action lawsuit in this country dictates that hard working responsible, educated man should have less opportunity’s than a less qualified female. It should be added this happened three times. Now in my current situation I described earlier I can’t get help from anybody. Not the VA, not Health and Human Services, other state and federal programs,. It has been explained I don’t qualify because I am male in most cases. Even my local power company had a program for free energy star microwave oven, I did not qualify because I was not a single mother. To hear about a whiny fat girl break down, and manifested a emotional cry baby, poor me, case out of some verbal resistance to her wants sickens me. This is a slap in the face of people that have experienced real trauma in their lives. While I am sure this whiny fat girl believes she should get tons of sympathy, I say, get real and grow up.

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    • The article is a satire, intended to highlight the ridiculousness of the movement, but I certainly agree with you. Thank you for your service, and have an American day ??

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