UCLA Students Cause Outrage in China


Chinese officials are outraged over UCLA students’ theft of The Communist Manifesto from a Beijing mall. China’s Foreign Ministry Spokesperson, Lu Kang, commented on the case: “They already had FREE copies in their hotel rooms!” (sic)

President Donald Trump was able to secure the students’ release from Chinese authorities, after agreeing to send world-renowned humanitarian, Dennis Rodman, on another trip to North Korea, in hopes of negotiating the long-sought peace agreement Chinese officials half-heartedly claim to support. When asked if China’s Foreign Ministry would join on the trip to the DPRK, they informed President Trump that their envoy to the North Korean regime had recently been executed after it came to light that he was guilty of reincarnation.


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